Life

Happy birthday, Grandma

Beverly Changethelens, Family, Life, Pics, Relationships, Work

January 2nd is always special to me; my dad’s mother was born on this day in 1896 and, although she’s been gone for nearly 26 years, she is still a part of my world every day.

Grandma was 75 when I was born and through her I grew up knowing that age is simply a number; that grey hair, wrinkles and hearing aids do not change who a person is inside. That understanding helped mould me into the person I am today and probably put me on the path to a career I absolutely love and cherish. I will always be thankful for the time I had her in my life.

When I was 17, Grandma came to visit for my sister’s wedding and I asked her if she would return for my wedding someday. She laughed and told me, no, she expected she’d be “pushing up daisies” by then. (In retrospect, it’s probably a good thing she didn’t wait around. Lol)

The other day my wonderful boyfriend brought me a colourful bouquet of my favourite flower… daisies. I think Grandma pushed them up just for me.

Thunder and lightening and love 

Beverly Family, Home, Life, Relationships

When I was a little girl, thunder and lightning storms were a big event for me. I lived in a small town that was built on a hill, and our house was perched at the top of the hill; we had an unobstructed view of a beautiful valley and never ending landscape of evergreen trees and open fields.

During thunder and lightning storms my dad would open our garage doors and set up a couple of lawn chairs. We would sit quietly, just me and him, and watch the tremendous show of nature’s vengeance and balance, bright flashes of light… count one… two… three… four… fi- then crashes of thunder echoing throughout Fox Valley.

I knew I should have been scared but I felt safe with my protector next to me, and free to let the excitement and adrenaline course through my body. Every now and then an especially loud BOOM would sound or bright flash would light up the sky and my dad would get this sparkle in his eyes. We’d look at each other, eyebrows raised, and smile in amazement before turning back to the show.

Nearly 40 years have passed and every time it storms I still feel the love, the connection. I feel safe and free and full of wonder.

Tonight I am sitting on a swing on the porch of a house I love as dearly as the house I grew up in. And every BOOM brings him back to me.

Not so wonderful granddaughter

Beverly Family, Life, Relationships, Senior health, Work

I love my grandmother. She is a strong woman who has been through a lot in her nearly-90 years. She takes it all in stride without complaint or excuse. She is no saint but, in this day and age, she’s about as close as one can get. But I have a confession to make (and it horrifies me to mention this publicly) – I didn’t call her during Christmas. For the very first time in my 44 years, I didn’t speak with my mother’s mother to wish her a happy season and tell her that I love her.

Yes, I was busy. Yes, I sent a gift. Yes, she had other relatives around her, but there is no valid excuse. I felt guilty about it from the get-go but I kept putting it off, putting it off. Yesterday I learned that my siblings also didn’t contact her and my heart broke in two.

I called her this morning and she was delighted. No attitude, no words of reproach, no judgement, she was just happy to hear from me. Which made me feel better, but kinda made me feel worse.

I’m telling you this for one reason: I get it. I’m no different than you, I get lost in my life and assume that the elderly person I love will be fine without me. But I work with seniors and see it every single day… the loneliness, the feeling of insignificance. I should know better.

This a large part of why I believe in the retirement lifestyle so strongly. Yes, it’s important to keep in touch with your grandmother, but it is also comforting to know that when you can’t, when life pulls you in all directions and best intentions get pushed aside, you can trust that she always has someone to talk to, to smile and ask about her day. There is someone to make sure she eats healthy and often; there is someone to make sure she isn’t hurting or taken advantage of; there is someone to pick her up when she falls. It’s not as good as a call from her grandchildren but it’s the next best thing.

Now, go call your grandmother. Tell her I said hi.

Heavens to Murgatroyd!

Beverly Funny, Life, Work

{This was emailed to me by an old friend… definitely worth sharing!}

Heavens to Murgatroyd! Lost Words from our childhood: Words gone as fast as the buggy whip! – by  Richard Lederer

About a month ago, I illuminated some old expressions that have become obsolete because of  the inexorable march of technology.  These phrases included “Don’t touch that dial,” “Carbon copy,” “You sound like a broken record” and  “Hung out to dry.”

Back in the olden days we had a lot of moxie.  We’d put on our best bib and tucker to straighten up and fly right –  Heavens to Betsy! Gee whillikers!  Jumping Jehoshaphat! Holy moley!  We were in like Flynn and living the life of Riley and even a regular guy couldn’t accuse us of being a knucklehead, a nincompoop or a pill. Not for all the tea in China!

Back in the olden days, life used to be swell but when’s the last time anything was swell?  Swell has gone the way of beehives, pageboys and the D.A, of spats, knickers, fedoras, poodle skirts, saddle shoes and pedal pushers.  Oh, my aching back.  Kilroy was here but he isn’t anymore.

We wake up from what surely has been just a short nap and before we can say, Well I’ll be a monkey’s uncle, this is a fine kettle of  fish! we discover that the words we grew up with, the words that seemed omnipresent as oxygen, have vanished with scarcely a notice from our tongues and our pens and our keyboards.

Poof, go the words of our youth, the words we’ve left behind.  We blink and they’re gone.  Where have all those phrases gone? Long gone:  Pshaw! The milkman did it! Hey, it’s your nickel. Don’t forget to pull the chain, knee high to a grasshopper.  Well, Fiddlesticks! Going like sixty.  I’ll see you in the funny papers.  Don’t take any wooden nickels. Heavens to Murgatroyd!

It turns out there are more of these lost words and expressions than Carter has liver  pills.  This can be disturbing stuff!  We of a certain age have been blessed to live in changeful times.  For a child each new word is like a shiny toy, a toy that has no age.  We at the other end of the chronological arc have the advantage of remembering there are words that once did not exist and there were words that once strutted their hour upon the earthly stage and now are heard no more, except in our collective memory. 

It’s one of the greatest advantages of aging.

See ya later, alligator!

Smile Therapy

Beverly Life

Most everyone knows that we smile because we feel good, but did you know the opposite is also true?

There have been many formal and informal studies done around the world that prove the answer is a resounding YES! The simple act of turning the corners of your mouth up when you feel stressed, annoyed or irritated can turn your mood around.

This is something I do frequently; when I’m frustrated in traffic, psyching myself up for an uncomfortable interaction, or when I simply don’t feel like smiling. I put my face into almost a grimace… cheeks up, mouth curved, deep breath… and it sticks.

I often wonder if contorting my face in this way just feels so silly that it makes me laugh. Whatever the reason, though, my smile quickly becomes genuine and my bad moment is turned around. Try it – it works!Smiley